My Heart Wonders
by HalloweenGuardian
Summary: The title makes it seem all deep and stuff, but it won't be. LoganxKurt. Rated M for future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**My first X-Men fanfic of any kind. I'm actually really excited! :D I hope you enjoy.**

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Kurt sighed in boredom. It was summer vacation, the summer before college started, and there was absolutely nothing to do. Mostly everyone had left for home for summer vacation. The only people left were Logan, Jean, Scott, and Hank. Professor Xavier was on a trip to Russia, having discovered a new mutant. Even the Brotherhood was gone, so there was no one to annoy. Kurt had wanted to go home, but his parents hadn't been able to get the summer off of work, and they figured there would be more stuff for him to do near NYC. How wrong they'd been.

As Kurt was thinking of going to the extreme and trying reading to stave off his boredom, his door opened and Logan stepped in.

"Hey, Fuzzy, dinner's ready." Logan looked around and sniffed. "I know you're in here, Elf. Don't try and hide."

Kurt smiled down at the feral. "Who said anyzing about hiding?"

Logan looked up in time to see Kurt leap down from the ceiling. He'd been up there awhile, so, with all the blood in his head, he was a little dizzy. Kurt swayed a little before almost falling. Logan caught him just in time and for a second longer than necessary, held onto the blue mutant. Then Kurt laughed and stepped away.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, whatever. C'mon, dinner's gonna get cold."

Kurt decided to walk down with Logan, not wanting to pass up the chance to spend any time with him. Kurt had first realized he was gay when he and Scott had kissed behind the school's gym, but both he and Scott realized they weren't for each other. After that, Scott came out as bi, but Kurt had felt that he hadn't been ready for everyone to know his sexuality. It was hard enough being blue and fuzzy with a tail; he didn't need to be _gay_, blue, and fuzzy with a tail. So he'd kept his secret to himself and, thankfully, so had Scott. And then Kurt had fallen for Logan. He'd fallen for him hard. He tried to spend all his time with Logan now-a-days, even doing training, although he had almost died a couple times. But he knew this was as far as their relationship was going to go. The older mutant was never close to anybody, he never shared what he was thinking or what he was feeling; what he feared. So, Kurt decided to enjoy what little Logan did share with him, which was usually limited to "you're annoying", "your music is annoying", or "stop grinning like that, it's annoying me." Kurt chuckled quietly at the memories.

Kurt and Logan entered the kitchen just in time for Logan to get hit the face with some spaghetti sauce. Kurt looked over to see Scott and Jean fighting over a spoon, staring in horror at Logan.

"Oh my God, Logan, I am so sorry. Scott and I, we were-"

"We were just fighting over who got to stir."

"Good maturity levels there."

Kurt couldn't help but giggle as a muscle twitched in Logan's face. He ran a long blue finger down the side of Logan's face and stuck it in his mouth.

"Mmm, vodka sauce. My favorite."

Scott and Jean burst out laughing as Logan grabbed a dish towel and started wiping his face. He started grumbling about how teenagers now-a-days didn't respect their elders.

"We're not teenagers anymore, Logan." Scott said as he placed the salad bowl on the table. "Well, most of us." They all looked over at Kurt.

"Hey, I'm 18. Zat's technically an adult."

"Don't you hear the word 'teen' in 'eighteen'?" Jean smiled at Kurt's pout. "Don't sweat it Kurt. We treat you like an adult, don't we?"

"Vith all ze responsibilities you guys give me, I feel more like a mule zan an adult." Kurt glared at Hank as he sat down laughing.

"'Duty is what one expects from others.' Oscar Wilde." Hank said, putting his glasses on.

"Can we eat now, bub? I'm starving." Logan extended one of his adamantium claws to spear some bread. He was about to bite into it when he looked over at Kurt, whose eyebrow was raised. "What?"

"I zought my table manners were bad."

Logan grumbled, but took the bread off his claw all the same. The rest of dinner went on without incident, with Kurt telling jokes, Hank quoting Shakespeare, and Logan eating most of the food. It was Kurt and Logan's turn to do the dishes that night, and both decided to get it over with instead of putting if off until later. Logan could hear the TV down the hall, but it was severely muted by four walls, and just the sounds of the water running, and dishes clinking together almost calmed him. Kurt was washing as slowly as he could, to prolong his and Logan's time together. It was almost peaceful, as if they were the only two in the house. Kurt liked that idea. He liked to think about what he and Logan could be doing now, if they were the only two in the Institute. They certainly wouldn't be washing dishes. They'd be in his bed, Logan over him, nipping him in the right places, Kurt moaning, panting, calling out Logan's name. . .

"Kid? Kid!"

"Vha-, Vhat?" Kurt came out of his imaginary world and saw that Logan's face was only a few inches away from his.

"Are you okay, kid?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Vhy?"

"You stopped washing the dishes, and looked kinda red, if that's possible."

Kurt blushed, hoping that Logan really couldn't see the blood rushing to his cheeks, and other places.

"Are you feeling sick?" Logan actually looked like he cared if Kurt was sick or not. Kurt smiled up at Logan.

"I'm fine, really."

"Just to be safe, go to bed. I can finish the dishes."

"But I-"

"No 'buts' kid. Go to bed. We don't need you getting sick."

Kurt suddenly felt a rush of anger. "I'm not a kid anymore. I'm an adult, legally and mentally." Logan snorted at this. "I am, and if you can't handle zat, zen maybe you should leave me alone." And with that Kurt teleported to his room. He was angry. He tried to convince himself that he didn't know why, that he was being stupid for being angry. But he felt justified. If he would always be a kid in Logan's mind, how could he ever dream of going further? And that pissed him off. He punched a wall and instantly regretted it.

"Ah, I zink I broke something." Kurt tested his two long fingers by flexing them and was relieved to feel it didn't hurt too much to move them. Then he sighed. "Zis night is not getting zat much better, is it?" He decided to turn in early; there wasn't anything else to do anyway. He didn't want to watch TV with Scott and Jean, he didn't want to listen to Shakespeare, and he certainly didn't want to see Logan. As he changed, Kurt sighed again.

"Maybe I am just a kid. I vas being childish."

"You could say that again, bub."

Kurt shot up from his bed and stared at the door. He could see Logan outlined, but he couldn't make out any details due to the hallway light. He wasn't sure if Logan was angry, amused, or indifferent.

"Vhat are you doing here?" Kurt asked gloomily, turning his back to the other mutant. Kurt felt Logan sit on the other side of the bed. He looked over to see Logan's back was to him.

"Look, ki-. . . Kurt, I'm sorry if. . . if I hurt your feelings, down in the kitchen. I didn't mean to."

Kurt was speechless with surprise. He'd never heard Logan apologize before. It took him a moment to realize he should say something back. He chose his words carefully.

"I'm ze one who should be apologizing. I acted like a child. I shouldn't have gotten angry vith you." Kurt felt Logan get off the bed and walk over to his side. Kurt looked up to see Logan sit down next to him. He couldn't help but gulp when Logan placed a warm hand on his knee.

"Listen, Kurt, I know I can be harsh sometimes; I can even be mean."

Kurt nodded at this.

"No need to agree so quickly." Logan said, growling quietly.

"Sorry."

Logan continued. "But, if I ever cross the line, I want you to tell me. I don't like hurting my friends, and I especially don't like hurting you."

By this time, Kurt really couldn't believe his pointed ears. Logan was almost being. . . sweet. It was actually kind of scaring Kurt. He smiled over at Logan.

"Don't vorry about it, Logan. I promise to call you out venever you annoy me."

Logan smirked. "I didn't say whenever I annoyed you, bub. Just whenever I crossed a line." There was a silence as they looked at each other. Kurt felt an urge to lean forward, and he decided to risk it. He could barely keep his excitement to himself when he saw that Logan was leaning in as well. Kurt closed his eyes, and waited for Logan's lips to meet his. Unfortunately, they didn't, because Jean chose that moment to telepathically call everyone down to the Danger Room for the scheduled training session. Kurt groaned in frustration. _I totally forgot._ He heard Logan mutter "Shit."

"Vell, I guess ve should go down." Kurt said awkwardly.

"Uh, yeah." Logan mumbled. He stood up and grabbed Kurt's hand to help him up. "Let's go."

"Um, I kinda gotta change." Kurt gestured to his clothes, which consisted of boxers and a t-shirt. "Not exactly training attire."

"Oh, right. Well, see you down there." And before Kurt could stop him, Logan was gone. Kurt wanted to kick himself. He should've just ignored Jean's message, and gone for the kiss. But he'd been too scared. He sighed. The moment was gone, and he was deathly afraid it would never be recreated.

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**First chapter done. Hopefully everyone will enjoy it. Please review if you'd like to see it continued. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, so people liked the first chapter. That's awesome. I'll try my hardest to make this chapter just as good. It may seem a little emo, considering I'm listening to Dashboard Confessional :P Anyway, enjoy :D**

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By this point in the day, Kurt wanted to scream. Logan had been avoiding him since the training the night before; he hadn't even looked at Kurt. And that hurt Kurt so much. Logan had been there, almost within Kurt's grasp, and then suddenly it was like he was on the South Pole, dancing and singing with the penguins*. Kurt knew Scott knew something was up, but every time it looked like Scott was going to ask him what was wrong, Kurt said he had just remembered he needed to go do something, and he ported to his room. Kurt wanted to spend the whole day there, moping, but he knew the others wouldn't let him do that. Well, the hanging out in his room part. If they knew how he felt at that moment, they might've allowed the moping.

There was suddenly a knock on his door. Kurt sat up from his bed and wearily said "Come in". It was Scott. He smiled at Kurt, but Kurt was too depressed to smile back.

"Kurt, what's wrong? And don't say you have anything to do."

"It's nozing, really." Kurt lay back down.

Scott studied his friend's face for a moment.

"It has something to do with Logan, doesn't it?"

Kurt's head snapped up as he stared at Scott. "But, how-"

"Dude, you're not exactly known for your subtlety. Everyone knows. Well, everyone except Logan, apparently."

Kurt sighed. "Ze problem is, I'm afraid zat maybe he does know, and zat's vhy he's avoiding me."

"What happened Kurt? You know you can tell me."

"Vell, I guess I should tell someone."

So Kurt told Scott what had happened; how Logan had seemed on the verge of kissing him, and then how Jean's message had ruined everything. The last part Kurt said a little bitterly, and Scott smiled.

"You can't blame Jean for her poor timing."

"Yeah, I know, but it doesn't make it any better."

Scott put an arm around Kurt shoulder and pulled him close.

"It's okay Kurt; everything will work out in the end."

Just at that moment Logan opened Kurt's door. "Kurt, I wanted to talk to y-" Logan stopped looking at an interesting spot on the floor to see Kurt leaning against Scott's chest, with Scott's arms wrapped around him in a hug. They pulled apart, but Kurt could see Logan was really angry.

"Out."

Scott stood up and left, but not before giving Kurt a thumbs-up. Then Logan slammed the door shut.

"Vhat's your problem, Logan?"

"I. . . don't really know."

"Vhat does that even mean?"

"Look, I just wanted to talk to you."

"Vell, maybe I don't vant to listen."

Logan growled and pushed Kurt down on the bed. Kurt didn't really mind the rough treatment; he learned later he likes it rough.

"You have no choice but to listen to me. I'm your teacher."

"Not anymore."

"I'm still higher authority."

"Zat doesn't make you my mozer!"

"Why are you sassing me, bub?"

"Because it seems to be ze only vay for you to notice me!"

There was a silence as each glared at the other before Logan sighed and sat down in Kurt's desk chair.

"I'm not an idiot."

Kurt continued to glare at Logan. "Vhat does zat mean, exactly?"

"I know how you feel about me."

Kurt blushed, and turned to glare at a wall. "I don't know vhat you mean."

Logan laughed. "Don't play dumb, kid. I know you've felt something for me for a _long_ time. You do learn something after living as long as I have."

Kurt wanted to melt through the floor. Kitty would've been useful right about now. He was about to port when Logan grabbed one of his wrists and pulled him down into his lap. Kurt, slightly dazed by his closeness to Logan, looked up to see brown eyes staring into his face.

"And I've learned never to deny what my heart tells me is true." And with that, Logan leaned in and pressed his lips against Kurt's. His lips were surprisingly soft, and Kurt couldn't help moaning slightly into the kiss. He felt Logan chuckle into the kiss. The Kiss. It had finally happened. And Kurt felt he'd explode with. . . he didn't know what to call the emotion that was flooding his body. It was more than lust, maybe even more than love.

The kiss ended far too soon for either party, but before they could continue, there was a commotion downstairs.

"Kurt!"

"Like, where is everybody?"

"There's got to be someone here, _cher_."

"Oh my god, it's Rogue!" Kurt, totally forgetting that he was in Logan's lap, with Logan wanting to kiss him, and probably fuck him, ported to the top of the stairs to see Rogue, Kitty, and Gambit standing at the bottom of the stairs. "Vat're you guys doing here?" He smiled as his sister ran up the stairs and hugged him. Ever since Rogue had learned to control her powers, she and Kurt seemed to hug all the time.

"Look at you! All grown up, and heading to college."

"Vell, vat about you? Vorking girl in ze mean law firms of New York."

"Well, my boss told me to take some vacation off, because I've been working so hard." She brought Kurt down to see Kitty and Gambit. "Kitty's parents had to deal with an emergency, and Gambit; well. . ."

"I'm with da _belle fille_, _non_?"

Rogue blushed at this. "Well, maybe not _together_, necessarily."

Gambit made a fake stabbing motion to his heart. "You kill me, _mon cher_."

Kitty ran over and hugged Kurt tightly. "Like, Kurt, how are you?"

Kurt was about to respond when he heard a growling noise behind him. He turned around to see a disgruntled and slightly pissed-off Logan walking down the stairs.

"Oops. . . "

"Like, what is it Kurt?"

"I'll tell you later." Kurt whispered to Kitty, signaling to his sister. He didn't want her to know about him and Logan, not yet. God only knew what she'd do to Logan.

"Oh, okay. I totally get it." Kitty winked at Kurt as she grabbed her luggage. "Well, I'm, like, off to my room, in case anyone needs me."

"Yeah, I'll go unpack too."

"May I tag along, _cher_?"

Both Logan (being partly in charge with the Professor gone) and Rogue said "No!" at the same time. Gambit scowled, but headed towards the kitchen.

"Talk to you later, Kurt?" Rogue asked on her way up.

Kurt smiled at her. "Course." Rogue smiled, and patted Logan on the shoulder as she went down the corridor to her old room. Kurt looked up at Logan.

"Sorry about zat."

Logan stepped down until he was on the same step as Kurt.

"It's okay, kid. We'll continue later." Logan kissed Kurt, and Kurt could feel his tail moving back and forth. He was happy, and he hoped nothing would ruin the bliss he was feeling.

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*****_**A joke, because Hugh Jackman, who played Wolverine in the live action movies voiced Memphis in Happy Feet.**_

__**Please Review! Also, Dear FiresideChild; I want my f*cking brownies :D**


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